2 weeks

So for two weeks now I've been on my own.  The husband is out of the house, our contact is brief and necessary.  He has not been able to come get more of his things, but he is limited on that- so I don't mind.

Yesterday I finally told Gabriel that his dad is now living with his Aunt and he won't be coming back home to live with us.  Ok, I told him while we were in Target getting ready to buy him some toys with the birthday money he got from his Grandmother- but it was the first time he asked, "when is Dad coming back from the hospital."  I might have told him sooner, up until this point, I let him assume Dad was still IN the hospital.  This was his first week of school and all- no need to upset him.

So I told him, and he was upset, but then distracted by the toys he could buy for $50.  He even bought something for his brother.

In two weeks I have yet to get this house cleaned, but I can tell you that there is already a better energy in this house.  I can't say that the husband was the one bringing in all the bad energy- I'm sure it was coming off of me in waves of anger and resentment.  I truly feel this is better for everyone.  Alex agrees that it's a lot less stressed in the house.  That I am more fun to be around.  He likes not having a 'bed time' but he still goes to bed around 10 or 10:30 every night.

We are all excited about the prospect of finding a new place to live.  Even though we will be moving farther away, I plan to keep the kids in the same schools as part of my commuting process.  Carpool and free toll roads if you have three or more in the car.  It will be tough, but you know, spending extra time in the car with my kids every day is better than no time with them at all.  Alex will be getting his license sometime next year- he can drive home sometimes.

Chris has not been around as much, due to his work schedule but the kids really like having him around when he is.  Gabriel has taken to him nicely, and while he sometimes struggles with guilt, I've assured him that he's not being unloyal to his dad by liking Chris.  Even his dad likes Chris.  He's a likable guy.  Responsible, hard working, fun and handy around the house.  The decision to move in together is one we have been talking about for a while.  It was all a matter of time- when Mike moved out and such.  He's been around and around the boys for a few months now.  They are used to him and him being here.  I have asked them all- how would you feel about Chris moving into our new house (when we find it) with us.  They all agreed that it would be great. Lots of big changes, and while I am usually one to handle one change at a time, this time I think it's best to make them all closer together, so we can adapt and move on together.

This week while I am still looking for a house in the Inland Empire, I'm also looking into buying a new car.  Well, a used one- but new to me!  My van is on her last gasps of breath and it's time to turn the old girl out.  I can't wait to drive around in a zippy 4 door sedan with air conditioning and well aligned tired.

So life is changing, and the living is good.  I'm calm and happy and so are my boys.  That's what matters right?