I think that the back and forth of my husbands issues can only be compared to the way my feelings about this marriage go equally back and forth. One minute I am ready to kill him and the next minute I am thinking... well maybe. Sometimes it's just hard to visualize what life is going to look like on the other side.
There's going to be some things going on within the next month that I won't really go in to- but he and I will be taking kind of a break. We both need it. What happens after the break? I don't know. Will he come back home, probably, will he STAY home? I'm just not sure. It could go either way- I guess what happens on the break will decide.
A month ago I said it was over. I have my reasons, but the biggest reason is this:
My husband and I are friends. Sometimes very good friends, sometimes not so good. But no less, we are friends. We are two people that share an apartment and children. There's love, but not that kind of love. These are my feelings. If his feelings are different, well then I think he's fooling himself.
Either way, we are taking a much needed break from each other.
I have no idea what that's going to be like. When you live in chaos for so long, the silence sometimes becomes deafening.
About Me
- Julie
- Using my 40's as a do-over for my thirties, only smarter. I often mistake the bees and honey reference with the one about free milk and a cow. This might explain my whole life.
2 comments:
Hugs.
Good for you! Gotta another friend finally giving up on a really bad marriage. Must be the comet. Or something.
But where do the kids end up? Kinda wondering about the "deafening silence" thing.
Keep the faith.
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