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Using my 40's as a do-over for my thirties, only smarter. I often mistake the bees and honey reference with the one about free milk and a cow. This might explain my whole life.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

i can't even think of a good title for this

When my husband returns- I'm going to kill him.

Prepare to be grossed out- ish.

So today on my way home from work, I was dying of thirst so I grabbed a Sprite that was half empty and a few days old. I knew it would be flat but I was at the point that my throat was so dry I was choking- you know?

As swallowed the flat soda I knew something was wrong. Really really wrong.
Oh god.
Ohh my fucking god.

In the bottle, were three cigarette butts. What is the sound of vomit??
However, I wasn't lucky enough to vomit.

So after spending an hour in the bathroom and thinking how great it would be to have a bidet but at least I started buying the really soft toilet paper- I have come to a few conclusions:

I will make a concerted effort to keep my car clean.
I will NEVER drink Sprite again.
I will probably never smoke again- even though it's rare that I do.

My husband is not allowed to smoke in my car- ever ever EVER again.
Maybe not even in the house.

1 comment:

Old Bogus said...

Be sure and post the details! With pictures, if possible. :)