Emotional Ramdomness

I am not a collector of things. I didn't care too much about Beanie Babies, or Precious Moments Figurines or things of that knick-knack nature. They collect dust, cost money, and I have no space for things like that. I do however, have a few things that matter and that I will keep regardless. Random things, from not so random people.

Teddy Bears. Strangely, I have 5. It's funny because I never intended to COLLECT them, and do I SEEM like a Teddy Bear person?? But regardless, I have 5.

The one on the right is Barney. He is the oldest. I got him from my step dad when I was really young. Maybe 9? He bought one for his "REAL" daughter and I was upset, because what did that make me? So he also bought one for me. I think it was his first present to me, and really the only one I remember the whole time he was alive. The black one was a gift from Alex for Mothers Day about three years ago. It was kind of an expensive bear from a 10 year old (that he MADE his dad buy for me), but it's very soft and he really thought that I would like it. And I do. The one with the hat, I got from my vacation to Texas to visit my BFF Carrie. She bought it for me at Walmart, and it's just darn cute. The last one was a gift from my sister, to Alex when he was a baby- but he never slept with it or anything, and I liked it. So I slept with it for a while, and now it just sits over my bed.

This last bear cost about $200. That is part of the reason I keep it. I mean, hell, a $200 bear?? It was a gift from an ex-lover. A married one. It's the last and only thing that I have from him. I got rid of every last thing, but I kept the bear. All my kids have played with it, and I don't keep it in any predominant place in my house, but I just won't get rid of it. The bears name is Bonnie, which is short for Trever's last name.

I also have a few other random keepsakes. I have a small collection of bunnies. I think there are 4 of them. Brown ceramic bunnies, that I think were my step dad's. I have no idea why he had bunnies. But my mother gave them to me after he died, so I suspect they were his. I don't know why he had them, or what the signified to him. But I have them now. They are packed in a box, because I don't have anyplace nice to put them. I repacked them whilst cleaning my closet the other day, and I wish I knew which box they were in, because I would like to put a picture up, but I just can't dig through that after I worked so hard to organize it all.

This cute little vase with the silk flowers was given to me from Alex for Mothers Day. It was a project from his day care center when he was 2. There was a cute little poem on a card, that had a dish sponge inside. I don't know if I still have the card, but I still have the vase and these are the original silk flowers, you can see where Alex picked off some of the small flowers. :)



Then there are the roses. During my wedding ceremony, we were each handed a rose, and then he said something nice about two becoming one, and then we put them together and he tied them together. It was very 'unity candle'-ish and very nice. At the bottom of the picture there is a picture from my wedding, and you can see e-husband holding the roses. They have always been displayed in my house since we have been married- drunk, drugs or diabetes. They have never been untied- and never stuck in a box- not even when we've moved from one place to another. I suspect that even if we divorce, I won't untie them, nor will I ever get rid of them. I just can't.

It's funny the things we keep, sometimes without even thinking about why, or what that means about us. What do you keep- and why??