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Using my 40's as a do-over for my thirties, only smarter. I often mistake the bees and honey reference with the one about free milk and a cow. This might explain my whole life.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Nipple-icious

How EXACTLY do your nipples get chapped? I mean, I keep them well covered and warm. I keep them dry. I haven't breast fed in years. But they are chapped and scratchy. SCRATCHY!!! What the hell??? no, what the fuck??

So I have this nipple cream (it's actually CALLED Nipple-icious) that is supposed to make them hard, but it doesn't. It does however make a nice lip gloss. So I have that on them to make them less chapped and scratchy.

Nip-balm.

Do people in states that are actually cold deal with this problem? I understand why my lips get chapped in this colder weather. I am a constant lip licker. I assure you, however, there is nobody- and I mean NOBODY around that occasionally licks my nipples.

But, if you know someone, pass his number along, eh?

2 comments:

Andy Land said...

Isn't moisture the way to keep things from getting chapped?

Maybe you need some...ah never mind.

D_Man said...

I'm a doctor. Post pics of chapped nips and I'll diagnose.