A patient died yesterday. Of course, this is not shocking- in hospitals, people die every day. However this patient wasn't expected to die. Despite the fact that he was in the hospital, he wasn't even very sick.
Rarely do we get 'codes' on my floor. I don't work in the ER or the ICU. When the code was called everyone goes running to assist, or just as spectators. I did stand close by, watching the action.
I watched as the nurses I work with, my neuro nurses- specifically two very seasons nurses and one younger nurse- used every skill they have to save this patient. I watched the sweat drip from thier brows as they relentlessly administered CPR for over an hour. The Code Team was amazing. Amidst all the chaos, you could tell that they knew what they were doing. Physicians, nurses, respiratory, pharmacy, lab- even nurses aids were on hand to run for supplies needed. It was critical and everyone knew it.
The patient was not yet 50. The spouse appeared younger. I stood in the vicinity as the physician told her that after 80 minutes, and shocking his heart numerous times (I counted at least 10) they were unable to revive him. They worked so hard. Everyone seemed very defeated. The spouse was devastated. All of us were crying, even myself.
I was only able to see the patient from the chest down, depending on where I was standing. I've never actually seen someone getting CPR before. The amount of force that truly goes in to manually pumping someones heart, I wonder how often patients who have recieved CPR have broken bones. I noticed how his legs went from a fleshy color, to a dusky pale white as the time passed. I noticed how when they shocked his heart, his legs jerked inwards. I noticed how the physician on the case kept mouthing the words, "Come on... come on," even after so much time had passed, I think a lot of people in the room were skeptical that they would get him back.
I also took a moment to wonder how I would feel. If a physician was explaining to me that there was nothing more they could do for my husband. The widow was hysterical. Her husband was not sick enough to die so suddenly.
Life is precious and unpredictable. I experienced that yesterday. I watched a team of people fight to save this mans life. There was noise, and a lot of people, and blood. There was yelling and tears and the looks of despair and sorrow on the faces of these people who tried desperately to save him. Facing the wife, who just lost her husband, the physician didn't appear stoic or unmoved. He was sorry. I admired the nurses, my friends, for thier strength and composure. It's rare that you get to see people at thier true best. I believe I witnessed that.
I went back to my office after they called the time of death, realizing how THAT part is the only thing that looks like it does on TV. I started to cry.
No, it's not at all like it looks on TV.
About Me
- Julie
- Using my 40's as a do-over for my thirties, only smarter. I often mistake the bees and honey reference with the one about free milk and a cow. This might explain my whole life.
2 comments:
I wonder if it's better to constantly remember how fragile life is, or whether we would all be paralyzed if we kept it in our minds. I know I think about it more than I would like to, more than most people I suspect, and while I am often overcome with a sense of helplessness, I also am constantly reminded of how lucky I am RIGHT NOW and how necessary it is to live as fully as I can.
It is common that ribs break during CPR, especially with older patients. We were told to not worry keep at it.
I hoped they spelled each other doing CPR. It's hard work. And they were stubborn, maybe because the spouse was present. It's rare they work a patient that long.
I was also curious about his legs getting gray; if CPR is working, that shoudn't happen so his heart wasn't pumping right. Probably a valve failure.
Post a Comment