Oma taught you what???

My mother (aka Oma) has taught Danny, three year old beastie, his last name. It's cute to hear him say it. He refers to himself in the third person now, like he's Napoleon, or an old boyfriend I had. It's cute in a three year old way.

Except.

She taught him the wrong last name. I mean, it's not like she taught him my maiden name, or my first married name. "ier" in italian is kinda like 'yair', but in good old English, it's just 'air'. not "ee-air" She was at my wedding, she's my mother!!! Shouldn't she know my last name. And she taught it to my kid, and forgot to put the "i" or "eee" on the end. So "Fa-rare-ee" is now "Fair-ee-air." I get that it's complicated when you see it on paper. But if you are my mother, you oughta know!!!

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Last week Gabe called me into the bathroom and I assumed it was for AWA. (Ass Wiping Assistance). He is learning to do it himself, but occasionally, AWA is called for. So I went in to the bathroom and he was standing in front of the toilet. He was very proud and told me that he can stand up, he doesn't need to sit on the potty anymore.

I was glad for that, it makes it faster than for him to completely drop trou because he doesn't just pull them down and hop on the toilet. He takes them off. So this would be a time saver, and also helpful in less than desirable public restrooms.

"Oma taught me."

"You mean Opa?" I corrected him.

"No, Oma taught me. Not Opa. Oma."

ummmm...... ok. I guess it never occurred to me that he could be taught that without the equipment. I guess that is why she's Oma, and I'm just mom. Apparently I just don't think of these things. I think it's in the "Ways to prove to your kids that you will always be smarter than them - handbook for grandparents." I will concede to her "better than me"-ness on that one.