happy period.... sure.

Remember when tampons actually did what they were supposed to do??

Stay with me here.

Remember back in the day when Tampax meant that you were not going to bleed on your new skirt? When you could safely go to the ladies room every few hours and do a relatively clean exchange of removing tampon, wipe, and then inserting new tampon?

Remember when the tampon actually COLLECTED blood and didn't just merely SLOW it from leaking out and staining your new skirt? When the tampon that was in the toilet expanded and was pretty much filled with whatever menses you were having, leaving NONE on your panties or you know, the seat below you??

I don't have heavy periods. I don't have connected plumbing. I mean, I have the periods of a woman on the pill, assuming you are not unlucky in this sense, and if you are not- then you know what I'm talking about.... relatively light. One heavy day and then too many days of lingering and fading off- but the bulk of it is one, maybe two days. I am one of those women, so I don't bleed a LOT. However, my tampons REFUSE to work.

They don't collect anymore- they just sort of block the exit, and not very well. Why do I continue to leak blood- and then pull out a mostly clean tampon? Explain this to me, someone- please!! The purpose of sticking a wad of cotton INSIDE my vag is so that it doesn't come out like that post sex gush that you get on you way to the bathroom. It's JOB is to collect it all. The only time that it should leak is when the entire tampon is FILLED with blood, and not one cotton fiber BEFORE then. Are you with me here?

I would have a happier period of the tools for the task did their job. My only option is to change my tampon every hour, and then pulling out a TRULY dry tampon, and anyone with a vag knows that HURTS like... pulling out a dry tampon.

And no, I do NOT use too small of a tampon, and NO I do NOT have a LARGE vag either. I'm Asian, we just don't.

Tampax fuckers....