waiting waiting waiting....

We are supposed to go to the e-inlaws today. Yesterday e-husband told me he wanted to leave early. Everyone is going to be there around 1:30, he wanted to be there early enough so we could do some laundry, help mom set up and stuff. No problem.

I got up this morning just before the kids. We hung around a while- watched TV and had breakfast. I gave the boys baths and got them dressed. They are in matching shirts, so cute. I love doing that.

So it's now 9:30. I'm up. I'm showered and dressed and I had my breakfast.

E-husband has moved his sleeping ass from the bed, to the chair. And he's asleep again. He was complaining cause we are out of coffee, and he is out of cigarettes. Well, if I knew we were out of coffee I may have picked some up. I am not picking up his cigarettes. I have $17 left in the bank right now, so I'm not about to spend any of it on cigarettes. So now we are waiting.

If I think back on all the time the kids have had to spend waiting on their dad. When Sarah and Alex were little, he would have them get ready to go swimming or to the park- and then they would have to wait- for him to have a cigarette, a drink or whatever else he was doing. I hate waiting for him. It's one thing if we are waiting for him while he's getting ready- but he hasn't even started that yet. He's just sleeping. It pisses me off. HE pisses me off.

I think back on the years when he used to get up before I did, so he could steal my money. If he put half the effort into being productive for the family, as he did to all the really bad bullshit he used to do to this family- I wonder how much his life might change.

Get up.
GET UP.
GET UP!!!!

I have already asked him a few times when he is going to get up, and he says, "I will!" His responses are getting more aggravated. Oh, god forbid that HE is aggravated. What a douche.

That's the thing with the love/hate relationship. There are days that are really good and I feel good about being together, then there are days...like the ones we've had all week, in which I really want to smash his face in.

ahhh- there's movement. He's sitting up, taking off his jacket. groaning. Ahhh- there it is, "I don't even want to go today...." no kidding. I was waiting for that. Well, it's his family, not mine. He doesn't have a choice.

It's 9:34, lets see how long it takes him to get into the shower. I'll say 10:15.